Day 299: Stake Land

Stake Land

Hamburger Town

The zombie apocalypse vein of horror stories has become well-worn in recent years. Thanks to the popularity of Left 4 Dead, 28 Days Later and The Walking Dead, just about everyone knows what a zombie outbreak would look like. As much as I love the genre, it's been done to death. It's in television, movies, books, video games, and even on t-shirts. This poses the problem for writers and filmmakers. How do we have a zombie apocalypse without being a zombie apocalypse? Take out the zombies and put in vampires! Problem solved!

Stake Land is a 2010 vampire movie starring Nick Damici (Mulberry St, World Trade Center) as the enigmatic Mister and Connor Paolo (Gossip Girl, Revenge) as Martin. A wave of vampires has spread across the world as humans try to save themselves. The government has fallen and only small towns remain. A young man named Martin is saved by the vampire hunter Mister after a vampire kills his family. Mister trains Martin to kill vampires, explaining that guns hurt them, but stakes to the heart kill them. They travel through America's heartland on the way to the supposed safe-haven of New Eden in Canada. The visit small towns where people are still trying to live their lives amidst the carnage. One day, a nun runs in front of their car, pursued by two men in robes. Mister kills the two men and the nun, only known as Sister (Kelly McGillis, Top Gun, The Innkeepers), joins Mister and Martin on their journey. They stop in one seemingly-abandoned town only to be captured by members of The Brotherhood, a Christian cult, that has been taking over the country through violence. Their leader, Jebedia Loven (Michael Cerveris, The Vampire's Assistant, Fringe), reveals that one of the men that Mister had killed was his son. Mister is left in front of vampires in the woods while Martin and Sister are taken back to camp. Loven allows Martin to leave, who manages to find Mister still alive. They continue to make their way when they pick up another traveler, a pregnant girl named Belle (Danielle Harris, Halloween II, Left For Dead) and a marine named Willie (Sean Nelson, The Freebie, The Wood). They return to where The Brotherhood was camped and Mister leaves Loven to be eaten by vampires. The group manages to find Sister in a small town, but the Brotherhood drops vampires into the town via helicopter. How will Mister and Martin survive and will they ever reach New Eden?

I prefer my steak medium well, not stuffed into a vampire's mouth

Before I get into things like the acting and violence in the movie, I have to address two very big plot devices: Politics and Religion. The movie has a huge Libertarian bent to it, to the point where they might as well be smacking the audience in the face with a copy of Atlas Shrugged. I don't buy into the cult of Ayn Rand and Ron Paul, so having to sit through a movie where a) the government folds faster than Superman on laundry day, b) towns and villagers still exist through self-regulation and C) everyone is thrilled that the government is gone is downright silly. The world may be coming to an end, but everyone is thrilled to have their guns, liquor, and drugs. If the movie had been subtle about this, it wouldn't have been such a big sticking point, but there's nothing subtle about Stake Land. That brings me to my second point on religion. Just like with libertarians, I am no fan of the fanatical Christian Right. Making the villains (besides the vampires) into religious zealots is fine, but making them specifically evil Christians came off as a bit vindictive. Combine that with the character of Sister giving her cross to Martin, carrying around a mini figure of Mary, and then pairing it with a mini Jesus and I've had my fill. The least subtle moment of the movie comes when Sister runs into a skeleton literally crucified in a corn field. Subtley is a virtue and Stake Land takes that virtue out back and clubs it in the head with a shovel. There is even a scene where a bartender tells Mister that they don't talk about politics or religion inside the bar. Oh that's good because you're so busy doing that for the other 96 minutes of the movie. Look, I appreciate social commentary in horror movies, but there is a certain way to get your points across without coming off the like a propaganda film.

The story, written by Nick Damici and director Jim Mickle, plays out like every other zombie apocalypse film and just replaces the zombies with vampires. It's never explained why the vampire plague started or where they came from, which I found annoying. At least give me some hints. Characters just kind of drop in and drop out with very little in the way of development. A new character is introduced as Martin's love interest literally 7 minutes before the film ends. What the hell? And really, did you have to name the one African American character “Willie”? The final battle scene, which you'd expect to be long and drawn out, takes about 4 minutes to finish. I will say that the movie did have a lot of good action with plenty of bloody violence. The acting is good and the Jim Mickle crafts a good-looking and atmospheric movie. The location scout deserves credit as many of the scenes look straight out of an apocalypse. There are lots of abandoned buildings and worn-out backgrounds which are fun to see. 

SUBTLETY!!!!

The action and violence in Stake Land is perfectly fine. It's entertaining and thrilling to watch and would make horror fans squeal with bloody glee. The acting and direction isn't the problem either. It's the slanted writing with an obvious agenda that really gets to me. I hate the politics and don't enjoy having it slap me in the face. There are no anti-Christian overtones, just anti-Christian tones. If these two themes had been subtle and cleverly written, it wouldn't be such a big deal. There is nothing subtle about this movie though and it makes everything that much worse. There plenty of holes in the story, and issues throughout, like “if Martin is being trained, why can he never kill a vampire?” If you're able to ignore things things like this, you'll really enjoy Stake Land. If you're like me, you'll be annoyed and frustrated at a movie that couldn't just leave well enough alone and be a horror movie.

5/10

Day 199: Land Of The Dead

Land Of The Dead

Hands Across America was a complete success

I love zombie movies. Until recently, zombies were only for the serious horror fans. They were not dangerously romantic like vampire movies and didn't have the classic pedigree of werewolves or even mummies. Zombies are special because anyone can become one. There is no reasoning with a zombie, no cutting a deal to let you live. Zombie movies boil down to the basic animal instinct of survival and self preservation. The king of the zombie movie is George Romero. His original trilogy of Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, and Day of the Dead is perhaps the best horror trilogy ever. It's mixture of violence, blood, social commentary, and smart writing gave it a gritty realism not too common in movies. A few year ago, I was overjoyed to hear that he would be making another zombie movie. Would it live up to the first three?

Land Of The Dead is a 2005 zombie movie starring Simon Baker (The Mentalist, Red Planet) as Riley Denbo. Three years after the zombie outbreak spread across the globe and crippled the United States, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania has become a haven for survivors. Surrounded by rivers on three sides and an electrified fence on the fourth, the city is divided among the haves, who live in luxury within a tower called Fiddler's Green, and the have-nots who live in the streets and scrape by just trying to survive. The city is run by a wealthy businessman named Mr. Kaufman (Dennis Hopper, Easy Rider, Speed) who also owns a heavily armored truck called Dead Reckoning which goes through the towns outside the wall, killing zombies and bring back supplies. On a trip outside the city, Riley observes a zombie with the nametag “Big Daddy” remembering and learning things. He even sees Big Daddy communicate with other zombies. Riley is the recently retired commander of Dead Reckoning when he sees a woman named Slack (Asia Argento, xXx, Transylvania) being used as bate for zombies in a gambling event. Along with his friend and partner Charlie (Robert Joy, Fallen, The Hills Have Eyes), Riley rescues Slack, but all three are arrested. Meanwhile, Dead Reckoning's second in command, Cholo (John Leguizamo, Summer of Sam, Assault On Precinct 13) has stolen the vehicle because Kaufman refused to let him purchase an apartment in Fiddler's Green. Cholo, along with the crew, plan to shell the city if Kaufman does not pay a ransom. Kaufman employs Riley, Charlie, and Slack to get Dead Reckoning back in exchange for their freedom. At the same time horde of zombies, led by Big Daddy, cross the river and launch an attack on the city. Will Riley and his group be able to get Dead Reckoning back and save the city before it's too late?

So many zombies, so little time

Land Of The Dead has all the calling cards of a George Romero zombie movie. There is lots of fun, creative violence with loads of blood and gore. There is a good amount of action throughout the movie with lots of gunfire and flesh-eating. The movie creatively uses fireworks, dubbed Sky Flowers) to distract zombies. Next 4^th of July, take a look at the people around you watching fireworks. They look just like the zombies in the movie. Of course this ruined fireworks for me, but that's is fine. Sometimes you need to see something else to see yourself. The zombies look great with a mixture of traditional make-up and computerized effects. Some may complain about zombies using items such as tools and weapons, but it is important to keep in mind that Romero already touched about this concept in Day Of The Dead. This is not something new, but if you haven't seen the previous movies, you may not pick up on all the references and nods. There are plenty of jokes as well, making for a close, fun watch.

More importantly, thought, the movie is full of smart social commentary. The movie shows the reality of American life, perhaps even moreso now than in 2005. With the economy being sluggish, the rise of the Occupy movement and corporation being declared “people,” Land Of The Dead is full of apt analogies and satirical metaphors. Zombie movies work the best when there is a true enemy other than just the zombies. The story itself is decent, but doesn't really live up to the previous three movies. I think the movie focuses too much on Dead Reckoning and not enough on human emotion. Kaufman is a good villain with the combination of his ruthlessness and disconnect with the real world. He's sort of like Mitt Romney without the Reed Richards hair. Dennis Hopper plays his part convincingly well. John Leguizamo does well as Cholo and I wouldn't mind seeing him in more serious roles. 

Fight the zombies or go to Cleveland? Tough choice!

If anyone knows how to make a zombie movie, it's George Romero. Land Of The Dead keeps with the themes of the previous “...Of The Dead” movies and expands it for a wider audience. By doing this, the movie does lose a bit of the spark that made Romero movies so special. It is a fun zombie movie, but it doesn't reach the greatness that we have come to expect. Perhaps Land Of The Dead is one of those movies that needs to be watched over a period of years so that it ages like a fine wine. It is a fun movie with all the things we love in zombie movies. Maybe one day, it will be a great movie.

7/10