Day 325: White Zombie

White Zombie

Thunder Kiss '65

Zombies are totally in right now. Thanks to The Walking Dead, a rash of zombie movies, and a few real-life face-eating incidences, zombies are the hip thing. There used to be a time when you actually had to explain to people what a zombie was. Now, even little old ladies know to shoot them in the head. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, it's just hard having your special thing become pop-culture. Thankfully, there are plenty of other zombie-related things out there for the super horror fans to enjoy. As one of those zombie nerds, I've seen a lot of them. Many of the newer ones are just plain terrible, so I'm forced to go back in the past to find a gem. Might as well go all the way back to the first feature-length zombie movie, right?

White Zombie is a 1932 zombie movie starring Bela Lugosi (Dracula, Son Of Frankenstein) as Murder Legendre. In the country of Haiti, Madeline Short (Madge Bellamy, The Iron Horse, Under Your Spell) reunites with her fiance, Neil Parker (John Harron, The Invisible Menace, Street Girl). Set to be married that night, the two travel by coach through the Haitian forest, when the happen upon a burial in the middle of the road. Their native driver informs them that it prevents grave robbers from doing their unholy business. As they travel, they come across Murder Legendre, a local sugar cane baron and voodoo master who supposedly controls zombies. The driver sees these zombies and quickly pushes onward, leaving Legendre holding Madeline's scarf. They arrive at the home of plantation owner Charles Beaumont (Robert Frazer, The Three Musketeers, Law Men) who secretly loves Madeline. Desperate to win Madeline, Beaumont asks Legendre for help. Legendre gives him a potion that will give Madeline the appearance of death, only to rise like a zombie at a later time. The potion works and Madeline is soon buried. A depressed Neil later discovers that Madeline's body is missing from her tomb and enlists the help of Dr. Bruner (Joseph Cawthorn, The Taming Of The Shrew, Lazy River) to find out what has happened. Beaumont comes to regret his decision as a zombified Madeline shows no emotion and is a shell of her former self. He begs Legendre to change her back, but is drugged himself. Will Neil stop Legendre from zombifying the entire island and save Madeline before it is too late?

Staring contest! 123go!

White Zombie is widely considered to be the first feature-length zombie film. The story plays out as one might expect, though that is probably due to later films following the movie's lead. There is a good amount of suspense in the film and some tame action. I generally wanted to know what was going to happen to Madeline and Legendre. Legendre is a classic old-timey villain, complete with evil-looking eyebrows. His intentions were a little too vague for my liking and could have used some more attention and detail. The zombies are the traditional drugged and mind-controlled people of voodoo legend. You can't really expect to have corpses rising from the grave and eating people in the 1930s. The zombies themselves tend to look a bit silly, with some extra hair glues to their face. The movie had a fairly small budget and reused many sets from Universal's other horror movies of the time. While the small budget didn't completely hurt the movie, I think a little more money could have gone a long way.

It should be no surprise that Bela Lugosi is the best thing about White Zombie. He often channels his inner-Dracula, using his piercing glare to control his zombies. It was neat to see how the movie focused on his eyes and his hands so much. Never has a movie shows closeups of hands and been so full of tension. Madge Bellamy pulls off her zombified state very well, having a completely blank stare for entire scenes. Her large eyes and doll-like features certainly helped give her a stone cold appearance as a zombie. Both John Harron and Robert Frazer are way over-the-top in the portrayal of their characters. Certain scenes become almost comedic thanks to their overacting.

"Gasp! They're real and they're spectacular!"

Though very tame by today's standards, White Zombie is still an enjoyable horror movie. It's influence was seen in later zombie movies such as "I Walked With A Zombie" and "King Of The Zombies". The story is incredibly simplistic, but good nonetheless. There are some eery moments and a small fright here and there. Bela Lugosi is very enjoyable to watch, especially when he goes into his mind-control stare. Without him, the entire movie would have been a horror footnote at best. The zombies don't look that great, but they serve their purpose well enough. While it is not in the same league as other Universal horror movies like Dracula, The Wolfman, and Frankenstein, White Zombie is still a horror classic and can be enjoyed by many different age groups.

7.5/10

Day 319: Puppet Master

Puppet Master

Obey your master...master

I've reviewed a few movies courtesy of Full Moon Entertainment, including Demonic Toys, Decadent Evil,  Evil Bong, and Meridian. While all three were different, their similarities were obvious. All were made on the cheap and were completely balls-out insane. I mean, a talking bong that kills people? A Beauty And The Beast knockoff horror movie? Whatever the fuck Decadent Evil is? When a movie with murderous toys is the least batshit insane movie out of the bunch, you know there's something wrong. Full Moon did actually have a breakout hit amongst all their stealing piles of crap: Puppet Master. The Puppet Master franchise has spawned over ten movies, comic books, and toys. If a movie franchise has lasted this long, the original has to be great, right? Of course not, this is Full Moon we're talking about!

Puppet Master is a 1989 direct-to-video horror movie written by Charles Band and Kenneth J. Hall. The movie stars Paul Le Mat (American Graffiti, American History X) as psychic Alex Whitaker. In 1939, puppeteer Andre Toulon (William Hickey, Tales From The Darkside, The Nightmare Before Christmas) is tracked down by two Nazi spies. Toulon had discovered the secret ability to give life to inanimate objects and bestowed the gift on his puppets. As the Nazis are about to break down his door, Toulon shoots himself before they could get his secret. Fifty years later, a psychic named Alex Whitaker begins to have strange, violent dreams involving both the past and the future. At the same time, fellow psychic Dana Hadley (Irene Miracle, Midnight Express, Inferno), has a vision of getting her throat cut. Alex and Dana, along with psychic couple Carissa and Frank are summoned to the Bodege Bay Inn where their former colleague Neil Gallagher (Jimmie F. Skaggs, Cutthroat Island, Leathal Weapon) is staying. They meet Neil's wife Megan who informs them that Neil has killed himself and before his burial, insisted that the four psychics were present. As the day turns into night, Toulon's puppets come to life and begin to wreak havoc on the guests. Soon, only Alex and Megan are left alive. To their shock, Neil turns up alive and well. How is this possible and what does Neil have in store for Alex and Megan?

"Ain't I a stinker?"

As with any killer doll movie, you have to take the plot with a grain of salt. Done correctly, the killer doll genre can be quite scary and very entertaining. Child's Play and the Talking Tina episode of The Twilight Zone are proof. Puppet Master gives us different dolls with unique attributes, like knives for hands and spitting up leeches to keep things interesting. Sure, it's utterly ridiculous to see a plastic doll spit out multiple leeches, but hey, at least it's different. The puppets look good with some nice detail put into each one. The use of stop-motion gives the puppets semi-believable mobility and multiple first-person camera shots for the puppets' point of view is fun and mixes things up. There are some fun kills and the usual amount of violence and nudity expected in a Full Moon movie.

The problem with Puppet Master is that the over-the-top violence and action doesn't come in until the last third of the movie. Instead, we have to sit through a story that must have been dipped on molasses before it was made. I had literally zero interest in the psychics and their screwy dreams. It has very little to do with the killer puppets, which is stupid because the entire point of the movie is to see the puppets kill people! I didn't watch the movie so I can hear about psychics and the barely-their connection to Toulos. The dream sequences were ridiculous time killers that had a high unintentional comedy factor. I didn't care about Alex, which is a problem because he's the fucking main character. If I don't care about him, why should I care about anything else? On top of that, his hair was a ridiculous amalgam of Meatloaf and Dennis Miller hair. The acting is downright painful, though it's not like they had a lot to work with.

Yeah, this makes sense

When I watch a killer doll movie, I want to see killer dolls. I don't want to have to sit through some unnecessary blather about psychic. You wouldn't watch a zombie movie if the focus was on the main character's golf game, would you? The first 40 minutes are painfully dull and almost completely useless. When the dolls finally start killing people the movie actually becomes fun and entertaining. The variety of dolls kept things interesting and the first-person camera shots were a nice touch. The violence was decent and distracted from the plot holes and filming mistakes like an elevator clearly going up while the numbers go down. While I wasn't expecting Citizen Kane, I figured that a movie that spawned 10 sequels would have at least been decent. Demonic Toys was a better movie. DEMONIC TOYS! If you're morbidly curious or a completest, I'd say check out Puppet Master. If you're looking for a good movie, check elsewhere.

3/10

Day 303: Terror Train

Terror Train

“If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again”

I hope all of you are safe and sound if you're dealing with Hurricane Sandy. If you're not, I hope you're having a lovely day, possibly watching cartoons and eating tacos. Either way, stay safe and hopefully the power stays on so I can keep posting my reviews. During the height of the slasher boom of the late 70's and early 80's, horror movies were forced to get a little creative. I mean, not too creative, it was the 80's after all. There's only so many movies you can make based at a summer camp or in a house. We have slashers set in high schools, college, malls, aerobics gyms, boats, and, of course, trains. Well, at least this movie has Jamie Lee Curtis in it.

Terror Train is a 1980 slasher starring Jamie Lee Curtis (Halloween, Trading Places) as college student Alana Maxwell. During her freshman year, Alana played a prank on awkward fraternity pledge Kenny Hampson (Derek McKinnon, Family Motel, Breaking All The Rules), making him think she wanted to have sex with him. Instead, he finds a woman's corpse inside their bed and is so scarred by the incident that he is committed to a psychiatric hospital. Three years later, Alana and the frat members who arranged the prank are taking a having a costume party on a moving train. As the train moves through the snowy wilderness, an unknown killer moves throughout the cabins, killing everyone involved with the fateful prank. Alana thinks something is amiss, but bodies keep getting moved. The train conductor Carne (Ben Johnson, The Wild Bunch, The Getaway) tries in vain to track down the murderer while keeping the party goers unaware of what is happening. The killer continuously switches costumes, making him difficult to capture. Will Alana survive and just who is the killer?

"I'm sorry about the "train of thought" pun!"

Terror Train is your run-of-the-mill slasher movie. You pretty much know exactly what is going to happen, but it's OK, because you know what you're getting into. Beyond taking place on a train, the movie doesn't offer much in the way of creativity. The train setting does give a small sense of claustrophobia that other slashers lack. It takes away the option for the characters to just “run away”. There are some good long hallway shots and the special lighting in the train. I do also like that the killer continuously switches costume, adding a bit of shock and surprise to certain scenes. Unfortunately, the movie goes to the well a few too many times and the music swells and jumps become tiresome. Terror Train spends a large amount of time focusing on both Carne and a magician that is performing on the train. The movie is almost unsure if Carne should be the hero or not, never fully committing to the character. The magician is a misdirect, but still gets way too much screen time.

For being a slasher in the early 1980's, the movie has a surprising lack of blood and gore. The kills are nothing special and there doesn't appear to be a central weapon used either. While over the top gore and blood isn't necessary for a slasher, it's odd that the movie decided not to go all out like similar slashers. When you take away the fun violence, you're just left with a mediocre train mystery. Jamie Lee Curtis plays her role well and has far more emotion than in Prom Night. The rest of the cast is fine and the direction is good enough to keep the movie going. The movie includes a lot of different characters, which is great for upping the kill count, but it's hard to keep track of who is who. It also cuts down on the attachment level and the audience no longer cares since they have interest in who is being killed. 

Hey, it's 80's era Mick Jagger, complete with bloody cocaine-nose!

Terror Train does have it's place in the slasher heyday of the late 70's and early 80's, but is ultimately a second-tier movie. It lays out like most other slashers with just a change in location. The acting is fine and it's always fun to see Jamie Lee Curtis in a slasher film before she really hit it big. Probably the biggest disappointment with the movie is the lack of blood and gore. It would have made the movie much more interesting than it was. Terror Train isn't a bad movie, it's just nothing special. If you've seen a slasher movie before, you've pretty much seen Terror Train. It's nice for a nostalgic factor and good to mark off on your checklist, but don't expect to be blown away.

5/10

Day 300: They Live

They Live

Cue Yello's "Oh Yeah"

As I've said in other reviews, I'm not one for conspiracy theories. I don't believe that the Freemasons or The Bildeburgs or the Girl Scouts Of America are planning a takeover of the world. If people can barely get your order right at the drive-thru, how can there be a global conspiracy to control money or power or whatever you want. That's not to say the average person isn't kept down through various means, I just don't think there's a few guys in an underground liar scheming to make me buy blue jeans or listen to that Gangnam-style song. But things are not always what they seem. What if there was some one, or some thing, suppressing the human race? Would you stop it? Could you stop it?

They Live is a 1988 science fiction/horror movie directed and written (under a pseudonym) by John Carpenter (Halloween, The Thing). The movie stars “Rowdy” Roddy Piper ( WWF/WWE Superstar, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia) as unemployed drifter John Nada. Nada finds work doing construction in Los Angeles and befriends Frank Armitage (Keith David, Barbershop, The Thing). While at a shantytown, Nada notices strange activity at a nearby church, and when he investigates, he discovers the church is actually a front, as the only thing in the church are boxes. That night, the police raid the town, beating on the homeless and knocking over their dwellings. When Nada returns the next morning, he finds one of the boxes from the church. Inside the box are sunglasses and Nada takes a pair. When he puts them on, the world suddenly becomes black and white. He can now view messages that are unseen to the naked eye all over the city. Messages like “Sleep” “Consume” and “Buy”. These messages of conformity and consumerism are controlling the population. Even more disturbing, Nada is now able to see that certain people, mostly those in positions of wealth and power, are in fact humanoid aliens. When he confronts an alien woman she speaks into her watch, notifying others that he can see her true form. Two policemen try to stop Nada, but he kills them, taking their guns and going on a killing spree at a nearby bank. He escapes the police and takes Holly Thompson (Meg Foster, The Lords Of Salem, Leviathan), an assistant director at television station Channel 54, hostage. While suffering from headaches due to wearing the sunglasses for too long, he tries to convince Holly about what is truly going on. During an intense headache, Holly kicks Nada out of a window, sending him down a hill. He stumbles back to the alley where he found the glasses and meets with Fred. He tries to convince Fred about the aliens and when Fred refuses to put on the glasses, they get into a fight. After the long fist fight, Fred finally wears the glasses and understands what is really happening. They join members from the “church” who are really an underground resistance planning to take down the aliens. The aliens use a signal from Channel 65 to camouflage themselves and it's up to Nada and Fred to destroy it. How will they be able to get in and destroy the signal, freeing the world from the alien's grasp?

Where's your Hulkamania now?

They Live is a really fun science fiction movie with just enough horror to keep things scary. While most alien invasion movies take place during (or slightly before) the invasion, it's already happened in this movie. There is no warning that they are coming, no giant space ship to announce their arrival, and no explosions to show their dominance. They are already in charge when the story begins. Reflecting the political and social climate of the times, Carpenter manages to capture the hopelessness of the average man who has no work or self-worth, hence the name “Nada”. The alien villains are the rich and powerful, using their wealth and status to keep the poor humans down. The secret messages to consume and stay complacent are chilling to see, opening the audience's eyes to real world advertising. I can see where certain types (*cough*Conservatives*cough*) may take issue with such commentary, but it's just subtle enough where the theme doesn't dominate the movie. There is a good amount of action throughout, which helps break up the overall message as well.

Roddy Piper may seem like an odd choice for a protagonist in a movie like They Live, but he is spot-on perfect in his role. He's a great mixture of brash attitude, charisma, and broken-down everyman that just fits so well for the character of John Nada. The famous line “I'm here to chew bubble gum and kick as...and I'm all out of bubble gum,” was a Piper original, not something from the script. Keith David is very good in his role as well. No amount of description can do justice to the incredibly long fight scene between both men. Rather than a quick scuffle or a cutaway, we see every punch, every tackle, and every crotch kick. South Park lovingly recreated this scene a few years ago, down to every punch thrown. This is also where Piper fits in well as his wrestling experience makes his physicality believable. John Carpenter is in his element as writer and director, crafting a fun movie with lots of action and just enough creepiness to make the audience uneasy. 

I knew the Golden Girls were skull-faced alien fascists!

They Live is a politically subversive movie with a good mixture of science fiction, horror, and action. While not a financial success, the movie's message and impact is still felt today. While the message is heavy, it's broken up nicely between the action and suspense. Roddy Piper is great and highly entertaining to watch. The movie has it's funny moments along with it's thrilling ones. The skull-like makeup for the aliens looks very good and certainly increases the horror aspect. John Carpenter manages to create a fun movie with plenty of social commentary. I'm surprised They Live has not been remade, but I'm glad it hasn't yet. No need to mess with something so fun.

9/10

Day 291: Sleepaway Camp

Sleepaway Camp

Yeah, stabbing a shoe makes complete sense

The term “cult classic” is given to many horror movies, perhaps more than any other genre of film. It's important to remember that just because a movie is a cult classic, that doesn't mean that it is classic. It's cult for a reason. Sometimes it's because the movie is obscure or too strange or eccentric for the mainstream. Other times it's because the movie is utterly terrible and people like to laugh at it. Then there are those few films that gain cult status due to one or two memorable scenes. These scenes are so shocking that just uttering the name of the movie will cause be to go, “Oh, that's the movie where...”. Sleepaway Camp is one of those movies.

Sleepaway Camp is a 1983 slasher horror movie starring Felissa Rose (Return To Sleepaway Camp, Satan's Playground) as Angela Baker. Angela's father and brother Peter, were killed in a boating accident and she was sent to live with her eccentric aunt and cousin, Ricky (Jonathan Tiersten, Return To Sleepaway Camp, The Perfect House). After the accident, Angela has become introverted and rarely speaks. Ricky and Angela are sent to Camp Arawak for the summer. Due to her shy nature, Angela is bullied by some of the campers and her counselor, Meg. Ricky tries to protect Angela and actually saves her from the head cook Artie who tries to molest her. While Artie is boiling water, and unseen person knocks him off a chair, sending boiling water all over his body. The teasing continues and Ricky, along with his friend Paul, get into a fight with some other boys. Angela begins to open up to Paul and a relationship slowly starts to build between the two. Meg continues to torment Angela, asking why she refuses to shower with the other girls and why she never goes swimming. At the same time, the body count beings to rise around camp, although they all appear to be accidents. Mel, who runs the camp, suspects that it's Ricky behind all the “accidents” and is determined to catch him. Who is really behind the murders and is Angela really who she says she is?

"I left the oven on! My pies will burn!"

This movie came out during the slasher heyday of the early 1980's, but it's general concept was nothing new. By 1983, we already had multiple “youth at a camp” slashers including the far-more popular Friday The 13^th, The Burning, and Madman. I will give Sleepaway Camp credit in focusing more on the actual campers than the counselors, which does make the killings more disturbing. This would have been a great chance for the movie to really separate itself from the “camp site” slasher pack, but unfortunately, nothing of real interest occurs. It's not that the movie directly ripped-off previous slashers, it's just kind of lazy. The kills are actually creative and fun to watch, but when Sleepaway Camp focuses on anything else, the movie comes to a grinding halt. We get that Angela is bullied, we don't need to see it for an hour. Her relationship with Paul is barely-there and just serves to get to the shock ending. The acting is pretty bad and some of the character's motivations are questionable.

Now, I normally don't like to give away major twists, but I feel it's necessary to discuss in order to properly review the movie. While most know what it is, if you've never seen Sleepaway Camp, I suggest you skip over this paragraph. Needless to say, SPOILER ALERT. The big twist ending is that Angela is in fact, Peter, who we previously thought was killed in the boating accident. For whatever reason, her aunt decided to raise her as a girl. Other than being nuts, there's no real reason given as to why she did this and why Angela went along with it. I guess we can chalk it up to being traumatized, but come on. While that information is fairly surprising, it's how we learn that Angela is actually a boy: a full-frontal naked shot of a blood-covered Angela, penis and all. To top that all off, the final scene has a naked Angela with an insane look on her face that lasts an unnaturally long time. Seriously, look at that picture below. Keep looking at it for at least 15 seconds. That's the end of the movie which was incredibly unsettling. Weird and pointless, but unsettling. The twist is quite shocking, though it doesn't really add that much to the story itself. Why does Angela go on a killing spree now? Has she killed anyone before? Why bother exposing herself now after hiding for so long? I don't know, I'm probably thinking too much on a movie who's main purpose is to shock the audience by showing a wang.

"Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

Welcome back, those of you who wanted to keep the ending a secret. Sleepaway Camp is a fairly mundane slasher film with a real mediocre story. There are a lot of holes in the story and the poor acting is hard to ignore. You're better off watching several other “camp site” horror movies. There are some interesting kills, though the movie lacked the blood and gore that was prevalent in other slashers from the same time. The movie has gained cult status thanks to it's truly shocking ending, having been immortalized in multiple songs and even parodied in the stop-motion show Robot Chicken. Just because something is cult status doesn't mean it's good. There's no real need to see the entire movie since the last 5 minutes are the only interesting and disturbing part.

4/10

Day 279: Let Sleeping Corpses Lie

Let Sleeping Corpses Lie

You lie down with corpses, you're going to get...uh...horrible diseases

“We're all automatons: each one of us is a slave to the basic instructions embedded deep within our brains, the instincts enshrined deep down in our DNA. Inexorable logics. Uncontrollable patterns in our behavior; tics and compulsions that we can't avoid; obsessive thought, violence, delusion, paranoia: we're all zombies!” Those are the lyrics to the song “Drive To Destruction” by the awesome British thrash metal/“Zombicore” band Send More Paramedics. Our friends “across the pond” sure do love their zombies. Whether it's 28 Days Later, Shaun Of The Dead, or the television series Dead Set, the UK has a solid history of making good zombie-related entertainment. Most of my examples, though are from the bast 15 years. I felt it was time to go back into horror's past and see a British zombie movie from an earlier time. Well, it's actually filmed in Italy and has mostly Italian actors, but it's supposed to take place in England, so we'll go with that.

Let Sleeping Corpses Lie (also known as The Living Dead At The Manchester Morgue and Don't Open The Window) is 1974 Spanish/Italian zombie movie set in the English countryside. The movie stars Ray Lovelock (Almost Human, Fiddler On The Roof) as George and Cristina Galbo (The House That Screamed, From Pink To Yellow) as Edna. On a trip to sell an antique statue, George's motorcycle is accidentally damaged by Edna. Edna gives him a ride to his destination, but insists on stopping at her sister's house first. They get lost on the way and George gets out of the car to ask some men for directions. Some of the men work for the Department of Agriculture who are using an experimental machine that uses ultra-sonic radiation to kill insects before they can destroy crops. While waiting by the car, Edna is attacked by a man who came out of the river, but he disappears before George returns. Meanwhile, Edna's sister Katie, a heroin addict, gets into a fight with her husband Martin and plans on killing him. Before she can complete her plan, she is attacked by the same man who attacked Edna. Katie escapes and runs to her husband who is then attacked by the man. Martin hits the man in the head several times with a rock, but he cannot be stopped and the man, now revealed to be zombie, kills Martin. Edna and George arrive in time to see Katie frantically running from the scene. The police sergeant (Arthur Kennedy, The Sentinel, Champion) accuses Katie of killing Martin, causing her to have a breakdown and be hospitalized. At the hospital, George learns that some of the babies, all from the area they just came from, have been trying to bite people. George and Edna try to exonerate Katie while the sergeant pursues them. Their investigation leads them to the town graveyard where they enter an underground crypt where the man who killed Martin was supposedly buried. There, they are attacked by the man, who brings other corpses to life. They kill and gruesomely eat a policeman sent to trail George and Edna. With the dead coming back to life and the sergeant on their trail, how will George and Edna survive and will they be able to prove Katie's innocence?

"This police officer is going straight to my thighs!"

I didn't know much about Let Sleeping Corpses Lie before viewing it, but had seen it's name pop up on multiple top zombie movie lists. If it can share the same space as Dawn Of The Dead, Planet Terror, and Dead Alive, it must be good. Right? Well, maybe for some people, but definitely not for me. That's right, I didn't like a “cult classic”. I was incredibly bored for most of this movie. I felt that not enough time was devoted to the zombies. Instead, a good chunk of the movie focuses on the asshole sergeant giving George and Edna a hard time like they're a couple of college kids on spring break. The story itself is quite bland for my taste, filled with unlikable characters and mediocre acting. The direction is fine and the graphic violence will make serious horror fans squeal with glee.

I will say that Let Sleeping Corpses Lie does fit in well between Night Of The Living Dead and the gorier Italian zombie movies like Zombie. These are the slow, lurching Romero zombies combined with Fulci's extremley violent zombies. There aren't a lot of action scenes, but the ones that do exist are pretty gory for the time. It's just not enough to keep my attention for very long. Instead of the dead rising from their graves or people turning into a zombie from an infected bite, these zombies reanimate after the lead zombie puts blood on their eyes. That's, uh, new to say the least. It wasn't entirely clear if a bite would change people, so that's just poor story making. By not having zombie bites change people, a lot of danger and excitement is removed from the movie. The zombies all make a constant groaning noise, which makes sense in terms of “science” but it does become annoying over time. The movie does have social commentary in regards to technology and authority, but I would have liked more. Once again, too much focus was given on the quest to prove Katie's innocence.

Just another night at Glenn Beck's house

Let Sleeping Corpses Lie isn't a bad movie, it just didn't entertain me. The pacing was too slow and there was not enough action to keep my attention. The zombies are of the traditional slow variety and the makeup used to create them isn't particularly special. The violence and gore are both very, very good, but they are used sparingly. I appreciated the brief social commentary used in the film. It's more than a lot of other zombie movies are able to muster. The movie is currently on Youtube, so by all means give it a watch. You may like it better than I did.

5/10

Day 187: The Last House On The Left

The Last House On The Left

If they remake this again, the poster will just show a Tumblr page

When I started this blog, I made it a point to say I wasn't going to watch movies that focused on torture. Of course, some movies I have watched contain a scene or two, but I avoided watching movies where it was the main plot. No Hostel, no The Poughkeepsie Tapes and definitely not Human Centipede (seriously, fuck that movie). I am just not entertained by it. I find it painful and unpleasant to watch. But what if a movie has torture, but is considered a horror classic? It's a classic for a reason, right? Maybe I had these movies all wrong and was just needing to see a good one to change my mind.

The Last House On The Left is a 1972 horror movie written and directed by Wes Craven (The Hills Have Eyes, A Nightmare On Elm Street). Inspired by the Swedish film The Virgin Spring, The Last House On The Left stars Sandra Cassel (Teenage Hitchhikers, Voices Of Desire) as Mari Collingwood and Lucy Grantham as her friend Phyllis Stone. Despite her parent's concern, they go to a concert in the city. Before they leave, they give her a peace symbol necklace as a gift for her birthday. Before the concert, they walk the streets in search of marijuana. They come across a grungy looking guy named Junior who leads them to an apartment where his criminal family, Krug Stillo, Sadie, and Fred “Weasel” Podowski, are hiding out after a recent prison break. Krug is a rapist and serial killer, Sadie is violent and sadistic, Weasel is a child molester, and Junior is hooked on heroin. The group assault the girls and Phyllis is raped. They are thrown into the trunk of the gang's car and the drive out to the country where the gang plans to cross state lines. Mari's parents are preparing for her birthday party, unaware of the danger she is in. The gang's car breaks down right outside Mari's house. They force the girls into the woods where they are humiliated, mutilated and forced to have sex with each other. Phyllis makes a run for it in hopes that Mari goes in the opposite direction. Phyllis is caught, killed, and dismembered. Mari gives Junior her necklace as a symbol to trust her so she can escape, but the gang stops her. She is raped and then shot by Krug. The gang then heads to Mari's house, masquerading as salesmen and stay the night with her parents. Mari's mother sees Junior wearing her necklace and discovers their bloody clothes. How will Mari's parents exact their revenge?

Playing "Let's Go To Gitmo" is the best!

There was a good reason why I didn't want to see torture movies. The Last House On The Left was very tough for me to watch. The movie is vicious in it's violence, degradation, and sexual assault. It is a raw, gritty, and unforgiving exploitation film that still resonates today. Despite the advertising tag line, “To avoid fainting, keep repeating-it's only a movie..." I still felt strongly about what happens. That's a testament to how powerful the movie is. It's also a testament to why I don't like these films. A majority of the movie is the girls' torture with a few sprinkles of inept local police being, well, inept. I guess it was to alleviate the harshness of the movie, but it just wasn't funny and left me feeling frustrated. I'd say maybe that was the point, but the jaunty comedy music makes me think otherwise. The parent's revenge is decent, but I wasn't completely satisfied. For a “violence begets violence” story, I don't think the gang suffered the same amount that they made Mari and Phyllis suffer.

In horror, we have all sorts of creatures, aliens, and demons, but this movie proves that the scariest monsters of all are human beings. All four actors in the gang play their parts very well as they come off as slimy, evil, and remorseless, even when there is a brief glimmer of remorse in the forest scene. Both Sandra Cassel and Lucy Grantham play their parts convincingly well and I commend them for going through with the movie. Wes Craven's direction is a bit spotty with some of the camera angles not working and the music questionable at times. Seeing this 1972 movie in 2012 makes it feel very dated.

 I love what you've done with your rat's nest

The Last House On The Left is shocking, disgusting, and rough to watch, but it is very “real”. It's this realness that makes it so scary and difficult to endure. There were times where I wanted to turn the movie off, but I persevered. I always ask myself “Was I entertained?” The answer, truthfully, is “No.” I found it very hard to sit through and did not enjoy seeing two girls being physically and mentally tortured. That doesn't mean the movie is not a horror cult classic or that the movie isn't important, because it is. The story is very basic and doesn't go beyond torture and revenge. I think more could have been done in ways of character development and Craven's direction is not the best. I think it's time to reinstate my “No torture” policy.

5/10